Silent Confession
by Errol's Feather
Summary: It is a few days before Christmas and Regina realizes she will be all alone this year. Emma manage to say they wrong thing when they met and therefore hurt her. Regina however decides to tell Emma how she feels with the help of some notes. SwanFire going over to SwanQueen


**_Author's Note: _**I've always loved love actually and so I thought I would try out a similar idea.**_ I wish you all a merry Christmas :o) _**

* * *

**_Silent Confession _**

It was the day before Christmas Eve and the mayor of Storybrooke had just dropped of her presents of at the Charming's after all that was where Henry would be celebrating Christmas this year. She sighed heavily, a cheek left her eye by the thought of the fact that she would be alone on Christmas Eve and Christmas morning as Henry would celebrate with Emma, Neal, the Charming's and Rumple and Belle. She hadn't even been invited…

It hurt her deep within; it really did, through the busy streets she was heading towards her car when she heard Emma call after her. She sighed as she turned and looked at the blonde coming towards her, smiling, her cheeks red from the winter cold. She was carrying what looked like a stack of presents. Nearing her she said, "To you from well Henry, mom, dad, Neal and me. Rumple said he and Belle would drop buy with something later."

"For me…?" Regina seemed surprised, the only one that had ever given her something before was Henry.

"Yeah, I'm sure you could celebrate Christmas with us if you…want to. I can ask mom to set an extra plate," the blonde offered, as Regina opened the trunk to get the presents in.

"Not, that is…fine, I'll be alright, besides you are coming over on the second day of Christmas," Regina said with a half-hearted smile.

"You sure, no one should be alone on Christmas, not even you," Emma said, now she was feeling stupid, that had not come out right at all.

"Thank you for remarking on that Swan, now if you will excuse me I have to go," said Regina, turning so Emma would not see how much that comment had in fact hurt.

"Regina, I didn't mean to…" Emma was cursing on the inside, this was not how she was meant to put this at all. She really hadn't meant to hurt the other woman which she had she knew all too well. What was it with her and not managing to say what she wanted to say whenever Regina was around.

"I don't care about what you meant to say, or you," Regina snapped as she got in the car and drew off in tears. It was not true though, not in the least.

* * *

It was Christmas Eve, Regina had just ate her dinner, turkey, stuffing and all that went with it as always, she was a sucker for traditions even when she was alone. She sighed, thinking about Emma's words the night before, about Emma and Henry in general. How she would rather wish them to be there with her, rather than at the Charming's. How she wanted Emma to be with her rather than the numbnut Neal.

She needed her to know how she felt, she couldn't wait any longer, and she knew she should have told her on the way back from Neverland. However seeing her with Neal and Hook…Then she and Neal had become rather close when they got back. She sighed wondering how she was going to do it without the Charming's finding out. Then she knew, she went into her office and found some big papers of cardboard to write down her messages. She had nothing to lose after all she was spending Christmas Eve alone, with presents under the tree and no one to open with.

The middle-aged woman got the notes and a portable CD player in the card realizing she had seen something like this being done in a Christmas movie something or another a few nights before. Maybe it was pathetic, and corny, but she had to try. After all it was Christmas, and a time for miracles, at least that was what she used to tell Henry when he was younger. To be safe she was not discovered she parked the car a few blocks away and then walked over. Even if it was snowing it was not cold, and so she would make her way to the door, hoping Emma was the one that opened. She rang the doorbell and as luck would have it was Emma standing there, she smiled as she said, "Regina."

She could hear someone call from the inside, and held up the poster saying, "Say it is Christmas carolers."

"It's Christmas carolers, dad, I'll be right in," she called, nodding towards Regina that had turned on the CD player with the song jingle bells. Regina blushed shyly, smiling back holding up two notes that said, "With any luck, but this time next year I will be dating one of these women."

Emma laughed seeing the pictures of two famous movie stars and a model she didn't even know Regina liked. Next note said, "But for now, without any hope or agenda, simply because it is Christmas."

She paused to look upon Emma, she wouldn't know from looking but Emma's heart was beating so fast. She nodded though as the next notes said, "And Christmas is a time for miracles and the truth. So I thought I would go with the truth. I don't care about the fact that you drive me nuts, or that you challenge me, or at I first though you were wrong for me. I realized, to me you are perfect in any way. And my broken heart will love you until the end of time. Merry Christmas."

She smiled at Emma, a smile that was enough to melt away all the storms in the winter, and all the snow. A smile that could melt her and push away all her doubts. Time was standing still as she smiled back, grasping the seriousness of the situation. Regina loved her, for how long she didn't know, but she did. The brunette sighed as she took her sheets and the CD player and started to walk way, her head not held high as it usually would Emma noticed. She could hear Neal laughing from the inside, Henry shouting something, but it all seemed so distant. Without further thought, not even caring that she was only wearing socks she ran after the brunette, a hand on her shoulder making her turn. She looked at her surprised, and for once Emma didn't speak, she acted, ignoring the turmoil of emotions going around inside her she placed her warm hands on Regina's cold cheeks before she kissed her. Regina lingered into it until their lips parted and Emma whispered, "Merry Christmas, Regina."

As Emma was backing away she was blushing as much as the other woman, her eyes sparkling and she leaned in to kiss her cheek, "Look under your three for a small present, open it tonight."

"What, why?" Regina seemed confused.

"Just do it, and I'll call upon you around midnight," Emma whispered, kissing her again, before she ran back in and closed the door. Regina sighed and walked back to the car, not knowing what to think or feel, only that she still felt Emma's kiss upon her lips and her world could not stop spinning.

* * *

Emma had just come back in when her father asked, "Why did you take so long with the carolers and why are your socks wet?"

"I uhhhh, is it time for cookies yet, I'll make some coffee," Emma said, her face burning. What was she really going to say that Regina had confessed her love and they had kissed out in the falling snow? No that was not a good idea for many reasons she knew.

"You okay, babe?" Neal asked, looking at her with wondering eyes.

"Sure, but can we talk upstairs?" Emma said, nodding in that direction. He nodded and followed her there, as Henry said, "Something is up."

"Nothing gets buy you does it kid?" said Charming and ruffled his hair in a very loving way.

Upstairs in Emma's bedroom Neal at once knew something was very wrong when Emma started to pace back and forth, starting with, "Listen Neal, you and me, it's just not working…anymore. You are a great guy and a great father, and I do love you. It's just I don't love you the same way I just to, not like I should when we are together. I haven't in quite some time."

"What are you serious?" he said, looking at her in shock. Was she really breaking up with him on Christmas Eve?

"Yes, actually I am. I've never been more serious than I am right now. Trust me I don't want to spoil the evening, especially not since its Christmas. But I can't sit here knowing that everyone is having fun celebrating Christmas, except…except the person that I love the most," she said, taking a deep breath, looking into his eyes. She had not planned to do it like this, not in a million years, but she knew that right now she had no other choice.

"You love someone else? Then why didn't you tell me sooner instead of now, on Christmas night. If you love another man I demand to know who. Is it Hook, I know he always fancied you, but I never thought you digged him, that you liked him that way…How can you do this to me, like this?" his eyes was shining with anger, with hurt.

"I know this is the worst timing, then again I was always bad at timing, we both were you know that. The reason why I didn't tell you sooner is that I didn't acknowledge it until just know. It's like I just woke up out of this daze. You got to believe me Neal I didn't planned this out, it simply just happened. And henry needs his family together," she said, tears stinging in her eyes now. She really hated to do this knowing it hurt him.

"Yes, I can't agree with you more, but you're destroying that bubble of joy right now! We're his family!" He spat at her, ignoring the tears. What was she talking about, wasn't he Henry's family anymore?

"You're the father! But I'm his mother. And Regina is his real mother!" she raised her voice now. Damn it why couldn't he see what she was trying to say.

"Here we go again with Regina! Emma what the hell! Why do you need this woman inside our lives! She's the one who destroyed it! Why would you even consider her now, why even mentioning her name?!" He screamed at her, his face red with fury. Why would she even bring her up.

"Because she's family. And she's the one I love you idiot! She is the woman I love! And she's family!" Emma screamed back at him, making his jaw drop as he looked at her in shock. Never in a million years could he foresee that one coming. He didn't even know how to respond to this, so instead he walked towards the door saying, "I hope you will be happy with her, but make no mistake she will ruin you."

Emma lay down on her bed, crying sadly, shivering, this was not the Christmas she had planned or wanted, no this wasn't it at all.

* * *

Regina had gone over all the presents from her family under her tree finding the one in question. Her heart was pounding and she had shivers of excitement run through her body as she opened it. Inside she found a locket, opening it she found a picture of herself and Emma, engraved on the back it said, "Yours forever."

"Oh Emma," the not so evil queen whispered, holding it tight for a second before she put it on. She assumed that the blonde would have come to her sooner or later telling her how she felt, and in the meantime she would have wanted her to wear the locket. It wouldn't have mattered much as no one would understand what it meant but them.

She reached for her phone, but decided to leave it be, after all Emma was most likely busy with whatever they were doing. Instead she curled up on the couch with a cup of hot chocolate and Christmas cookies, turning on the TV to watch some old Christmas shows.

* * *

"Emma, where are you going?" she heard her father ask. It was nearing midnight, the guests had gone home. Neal had been leaving first; Henry was in bed, her mother as well. She had hoped her father would be also.

"I have to…" damn herself for not coming up with a good excuse.

"See Regina, I understand, we all heard you and Neal earlier," he said with a crocked smile.

"You are not mad?" she asked him.

"I rather you be happy with her if she makes you that, then unhappy with Neal to please everyone," he said with a shrug.

"Thank you, daddy," she said and gave him a hug.

"No go, she should have someone there when she wakes up Christmas morning, we'll come by with Henry later," he said and smiled at her.

"Alright, thank you for…supporting this," she said and smiled at him.

"There is one thing though?" he said, looking at her.

"Yeah?" she wondered.

"If Neal had been here, would you still have sneaked out in the dead end night to see her?" he asked her.

"I think so yeah, see you tomorrow," she said, giving him a peck on the cheek before hurrying outside in the cold.

* * *

When Emma arrived as Regina's mansion she would find that the outside was covered with lights and shining ornaments, clearly the woman did love Christmas more than most people she knew. She was about to ring the doorbell, but as the house otherwise, except the living room seemed dark she decided upon try to get in another way. To be on the safe side she felt the door handle, Regina had left it unlocked. A smile graced her lips as she went inside. She took of her shoes and her black jacket and walked into the living room, seeing the TV was on, some kind of Christmas movie was playing, she knew it to be a rerun every Christmas. On the couch the brunette was sleeping peacefully, curled up, her hands underneath her head. On the table, a glass and an almost empty bottle of wine Emma assumed to be apple wine, a coffee cup, smelled like hot chocolate though, a plate with what was left of Christmas cookies, and a bowl of nuts. Some shells lying on the plate.

The three nicely decorated, the fire was still going, three socks hanging on the mantel piece, one with green and red stripes saying Henry, one that looked like a knee-high boot saying Regina, and one red with the head of a snowman saying Emma. All but Regina's was filled.

The blonde's heart grew as she smiled using magic to fill Regina's as well; it was only fair if the brunette had cared enough to fill one for her. She smiled please before she sat down on her knees in front of the sleeping woman saying, "Regina, time to wake up, it is Christmas."

"Whaaaaat," she fluttered her eyes and looked at her tiredly, confused at first.

"It is over midnight, it is Christmas, merry Christmas, Regina," said Emma and smiled softly at her.

"Merry Christmas, my savior, I thought you were having a party at your house," said Regina a bit surprised.

"We did, Neal and I...we broke up, or I did, he left earlier than the rest, dad was the only one up when I left," Emma answered with a sigh.

"You didn't do that because of me I hope," Regina could feel her heart beat faster; a smile couldn't help but to appear on her lips.

"Of course I did it for you, Neal...he wasn't right for me, but I am pretty sure you might be," Emma said, blushing slightly.

"Oh Emma," Regina whispered, happy tears coming from her eyes, as she let her hands, reach for her head pulling her in for a kiss. As she backed away she smiled saying, "Thank you for the locket, I love it."

"You are more than welcome, sure it's not corny, I didn't know what to get you," Emma was blushing now.

"No it was perfect as you are to me," Regina said, making her blush even more.

"You say the sweetest things, so are you tired, or do you wish to stay up all night?" Emma said, her eyes twinkling along with the lights from the Christmas tree.

"I am not young anymore, but if you have something in mind, I will try to stay up," Regina said with a small laugh.

"I just wanted to watch all Christmas movies with someone I love, waiting for morning to come," said Emma and turned to pour some wine in Regina's glass, taking a sip of it, before sitting down next to Regina that now was sitting up. She tasted it before she said, "Not bad, homemade?"

"Of course," said Regina with a slight laugh, adding, "Find something you would like to watch and I'll be right back with a mug of hot chocolate and more cookies."

Emma snatched one from the plate she was about to take to refill and said, "You baked these, these are sooooo good."

"Yes I baked those, I am glad you like them," said Regina with a slight laugh, before walking towards the kitchen, casting a loving gaze over her shoulder towards Emma that was flipping through her channels.

* * *

"Mmm," it escaped Regina's lips, pulling Emma closer. It was about 4 am in the morning and the two women were on Regina's bed making out. Both was still dressed or at least halfway, Emma's red dress was lay on a chair in Regina's room, next to her red with black lace, if Emma was not mistaken this would be one of her royal attires, which went quite well this time of year, considering Red was one of the colors of Christmas. That and the fact that it was both classy and it had been easy to get off, much like her own. Now Regina's arms were resting against her neck as she was pulling her closer, her eyes was closed. Emma assumed her to be very tired after all she knew her to have been up since 6 Am the morning before due to work.

"You want to sleep?" she asked, more out of concern of well being than anything else. She was quite sure that Regina could keep going for quite a while longer even if she should happen to be older than her. How much older she didn't quite know, to be fair she had never ask, even though she could have asked her on her mother about that fact on multiple occasions it had never occurred to her.

"More rest a bit if you wouldn't mind," she said honestly. Not that she wanted Emma to leave, then again she suspected that the blonde wouldn't do that. Emma smiled at her, gently stroking her cheek, and as she had read her mind she said, "Don't worry I'll stay."

"Good," the evil queen said, making Emma change positions so they could spoon instead, holding each other close. Regina's hands resting on top of Emma's as she dared herself to fall asleep. To her surprise or maybe fear the blonde was no longer there She got out of bed sighing maybe it had too good to be true hoping Emma would spend the night. She walked over to the closet finding a pair or white sweatpants with patterns of holiday poinsettia's all over. She found a matching top, or rather it had only a couple over the left chest. She put it on after she had changed underwear and thrown the old in the hamper in her bathroom. She smiled when she realized the blonde hadn't gone home hearing the sound of one of her Christmas albums playing from downstairs and the blonde singing along. Quickly she pulled on a pair of socks before hurrying downstairs to find her. She were to find it in the kitchen where she was making waffles to her surprise. The blonde had been up about an hour before and decided she would make Regina breakfast. Waffles seemed to be the easiest option and so she had started with the task. The brunette walked over and gave her a light peck on the cheek saying, "Good morning, Miss. Sw...Emma."

"Good morning, beautiful, i though you would like some breakfast," said Emma and smiled at her.

"You thought right, I'll set the table table in the living room before making some hot chocolate," said the brunette, going to the closet to find some plates and mugs, glasses and whatever else she would need, glad Emma had not made a mess while she had made the waffles. It was while walking past the mantel place her curiosity got the best of her and she took down her Christmas stalking. Mostly because this time it had been filled by Emma and not Henry. This was the first time since she was young her stalking had been given to her by then was her parents. She grabbed the sock and sat down on her couch, emptying the content and chewing a chocolate Santa while opening on of the presents, hearing Emma say, "You'll be ruining your appetite."

"I..." Regina blushed.

"You're too cute, go on," said Emma, kissing her cheeks as she put down the plate with waffles on the table. Regina was just about to give her a kiss as a thank you, when the doorbell rand. The brunette looked at Emma that said, "Dad was going to bring Henry over."

"Oh okay," said Regina and went to open. Outside was Henry and Charming, Charming too one look at her and said, "Nice outfit."

"Thanks, how has your morning been Henry," said she and gave him a big hug.

"Great, can I open my presents now?" he asked her.

"Sure, go inside," she said and smiled at him. As he ran to Henry he looked at David James and said, "You okay with this?"

"He's your kid, he should be with his mother's on Christmas morning, Snow told me to give you this," he said, giving her a present.

"Thank you, tell Snow I will call her and maybe stop by later," said Regina and smiled at him. He nodded and with that he was on his way.

Regina went back in only to find her son and Emma sitting fully occupied by opening their presents, or rather the ones she had put in the stalkings. She sat down on the couch with a smile on her lips, putting the gift from Snow aside for now. The content of the stalking seemed to be more interesting. She opened it gift for gift, finding three pair of new pantyhose, two pair of blacks and one beige, a set of black lingerie, a book, a romance novel it would seem, once CD, imagine dragons and chocolate. Regina smiled very pleased. She had no idea how Emma even knew her size when it came to the pantyhose or the lingerie, but she assumed her to have asked Henry about the matter. After all he could easily go into the bedroom to check if needed.

She looked over at Emma and Henry also occupied with their stalkings, both tearing away the paper the exact same way. As she removed the paper ever so neatly, they just tore it of. Regina looked over at her son that now had fully removed all paper and was looking at his presents, some new video games, a new pair of socks, candy and some comic books. He was browsing through them, a smile on his lips.

Emma looked at her content also pleased, she had gotten two new singlets, one light blue and one white, a new sheriff's star. She was a bit surprised that Regina had actually noticed she had lost her own. They again she was the Mayor so she should know at most times what went on in her town. In addition she got a not saying she would get a small raise by the beginning of next year due to her hard work. This was great, she never thought about it, but it was actually Regina that made sure she got paid. She smiled opening the next present, a book crime novel of some sort, candy and some cartoons she liked. She had no idea how Regina would know this, then again she could have asked Henry. She smiled at her saying, "Thank you this is awesome."

"I'm glad you liked it, and thank you," Regina said polite, she wished to hug and kiss her, but wasn't sure how Henry would react. She looked over at their son that said, "This is awesome, mom, so can we open the rest of the presents now, please?"

"Of course," she said, she had made some of their presents move themselves from the Charming's place to her house, the advantage of magic. Henry got over to tree fast as Emma sat down on the

couch next to her saying, "So what did mom give you?"

"Not sure, let's see," said Regina carefully removing the paper, finding a hunting bow and a quiver with arrowes inside. Fairytale land style, she recognized it at once, it was one of the first she had ever given to Snow. Being royal Snow had had a nanny, but Regina had tried to act like her mother as much as possible, and as her father was away a lot and the young girl had lost her mother she found it wise to give her something to distract her mind. Archery seemed to be just the thing and the young woman quickly got good at it. Cruel irony she almost killed Regina with one of the arrows. She smiled, finding a not with it saying, "You always were the best mother, and I really appreciate all you have done for me and our family. Maybe we could go and shot blanks someday soon. I love you, Snow White."

"A bow?" Emma asked with wondering eyes.

"One of the first I ever gave her," said Regina.

"You gave her bows?" Emma seemed confused by this.

"Yes and taught her how to use it," Regina nodded, letting her hand stroke over it ever so gently. She knew she would have to thank Snow White for it later.

"I never knew," Emma said, leaning over for a kiss hearing a ewwww from Henry. Emma ignored it giving Regina some sugar, before she said, "So kid anything for us under the tree?"

"Sure," he said, bringing them some presents before continuing to ripping the paper of his own. The two mother's shared a smile before Emma slowly, in a more mannered way started to open her own gift. Regina was soon to do the same, thinking it had been the best Christmas she had had in years.

* * *

Christmas came and went and soon it was time for New Years Eve. Of course it would be a huge party with fireworks down at city hall, with tons of fun for everyone around. Emma was dancing with Regina, glad that the two had become very close the last week, in fact they seemed to be inseparable.

Regina heard Emma's voice whispering into her ear, "Just how blind I've been. Now I'm here, blinking in the starlight. Now I'm here, suddenly I see. Standing here, it's oh so clear. I'm where I'm meant to be."

The brunette smiled, giggling happily, twirling Emma and kissing her right there and then. Of course she knew where Emma had stolen those words from, and in many ways she was like Rapunzel. She was happy and for once she didn't care if the whole world would see it, she didn't even care if Neal was glaring at them, it was perfect. She had her Emma and her Henry, he was amazingly enough dancing with Tinker Bell at the moment. She was a bit taller than him, but she didn't seem to mind. It was ironic she thought that she never dared to be happy after Daniel passed away, but now after those silly notes on Christmas Eva she dared herself to be that. She didn't care if there was trouble ahead, they could face it together she knew. She leaned against Emma's ear whispering, "I see you."

"And I you, did you ever think we would end up together?" asked Emma and smiled at her.

"I hoped or I would never gotten your attention the way I did," said Regina with a sigh of satisfaction.

"Oh Regina you always had my attention," said Emma and kissed her very lovingly. Henry wasn't sure, but as he looked over at his mothers he was sure he could see pink light surrounding them as they kissed each other. He shook his head thinking that if nothing else they most likely wouldn't sight anymore, or at least not as they had in the beginning.

It was midday the day after new years eve that Regina woke up to an empty bed and a note on her pillow saying, "Thank you for a magical Christmas and a romantic New Years Eve, not to mention this morning. I have no words other than wow…I'm at work, but met me for coffee at granny's round noon. I love you more than anything, Regina. Your Swan.

Regina giggled happily, sinking back in the pillows, thinking that her life was finally falling into place and that she was finally happy. Emma had been right the morning had been wow, and the night would be as well she knew, as Neal was taking care of Henry. All because she had had the courage to show Emma her silly little notes. Her silent confession of love.

* * *

Thank you so much for reading this story, feedback is always appreciated :o)


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